Disclaimer: Sorry Lovelies, this one isn’t totally beauty related (although it is a little.)
I’m in a pensive mood today. (side note, I’ve just realised that the Pensieve from Harry Potter was a play on words from the word Pensive – slightly delayed brainwave. Like 10 years delayed…ANYhow.)
I’ve been watching some other Facebook live videos and Youtuber videos, on a theme of doing something you love and making it work for your life. Now I feel very strongly that if you don’t like something, you should change it rather than be miserable about it. But I also know that extenuating factors can have an impact on this and make it less feasible.
I myself have been a hypocrite to this and stayed in a miserable working situation for a whole 6 months (which to be honest was 6 months too long). I dreaded getting up in the morning, I struggled through my day and when I got home I didn’t want to do anything. Up until this point I had been an avid gym-goer but being miserable at work killed my buzz on pretty much everything. And once I was out of the habit it became stupidly hard to do anything in the evening apart from go home, eat takeaway and crawl back into bed.
What I was missing aside from a healthy mental state aided by excercise, was what I’ve told others countless times; No one has the right to make you feel miserable unless you give them permission to. No one. I felt powerless because my bosses kept saying they were going to do something about the situation (also known as my co-worker) and that it would get better. They were cowards and took far too long. Even after I sat down with the Director and said “I’m not okay” and nearly broke down. There’s something seriously wrong with a management system if you do that and still nothing is done in any reasonable time frame.
I got a far better offer, being paid more to do less essentially. I’ve been in my new job for just over 6 months now, and the environment is a very far cry from what I tolerated before.
But I still have to ask myself. Am I doing something that makes me want to get out of bed in the morning? Am I passionate about it? Is this where I want to be in the long term? The answer? Probably not. I’m passionate about my husband and my family. I’m passionate about my dog, about makeup and beauty and fashion. So now I face a choice.
My dad is a wise man, though I’ll not readily admit it sometimes. He says in life you can do 2 things. You either make a career out of doing something you love, or you do a job that’s not too bad in order to enable you to do what you love outside of that job. At the moment I’m doing the latter. My job is secure, and enables me to have a pretty good lifestyle and follow my hobbies outside of work. I’m ambivalent about my job.
But here’s the problem; I’m not being challenged. I like a challenge, I like learning new things and becoming good at them. I like being busy because it passes the day. I have a busy mind; and I feel that my work needs to match it.
So where does that leave me? At the moment, my day job is enabling my hobbies. With some hard work, luck and time, I may be able to make my hobbies self-sustaining. I’d like to think that I’ll get there – but I stress, the main reason I’m doing it is not to make money. It’s a creative outlet for me to share with you and hopefully inspire, give you enjoyment or help you master or learn something. And if I haven’t done that then I’ve failed. But I’ll keep trying!
Do you love what you do for a day job? Or does it enable you at least to do something you love? Or are you stuck where I was 6 months ago? Food for thought.
I’m heading to the gym tonight to get a week pass – wish me luck! (I now haven’t been in about a year…)
Youtube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCkTWKJ2dRlSLYEFWEJ3_agA